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It is a windy day here in KY.
Elijah was outside flying his kite earlier. This was his first
time, as I recall. He loved it.
Hannah is in track now. She is in a relay race during her next
meet. She is excited.
Our puppy, Lizzie, an Australian Shepherd, is doing good. Some of
you remember when we got her back in February.
She has changed
Recent Pictures
Anyway, we are doing well.
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*****
Spouse Hunting Part 2
As we noted previously, God established marriage (Gen. 2:18-24).
Therefore, He has the right to regulate it. We cannot simply make
up the rules and expect great success. Rather, if we look to Him
and His Word, we will find laws and principles that help ensure
happiness and success in marriage.
Something that needs to be done before the wedding day, long
before, is to find out about the other person. Some of the
following suggestions were taken from Before You Say “I Do” by H.
Norman Wright and Wes Roberts.
Find out the beliefs and practices of your loved one's parents. The
upbringing your fiancé had will have a tremendous impact on them.
This is true even if they do not strictly follow their parent's
practices. There may be hurdles you need to overcome before
committing to a life-long relationship with this person. If he or
she is unwilling to give them up and you cannot live with them,
then matrimony is potential disaster.
Ask the object of your affection what defines being spiritually
alive. If he says believing in Jesus, but does not think much of
Bible study, prayer, or attending services, you have a big problem.
(We are assuming you are diligent in all three areas, Acts 17:11; 1
Thes. 5:17; Heb. 10:24, 25). It is difficult for one spouse to be
deeply dedicated to God while the other is half-hearted. Yes, you
can still be faithful and go to heaven. However, without your
spouse walking with you, there is much left undone and potential
unmet.
Which potential in-law is the spiritual leader? Is it the
mother-in-law or father-in-law? If the mother-in-law to be has to
constantly push, pull, and prod the father-in-law, then what type
of lasting impression has the left on your future mate? Fathers are
charged with taking the lead (Eph. 6:4). Mothers can do a fantastic
job when the father fails in his duties, as Timothy's mother did (2
Tim. 1:5). Again, the angle in these articles is what is best and
what will help give a future marriage the greatest chances of
success and joy.
How often does the other person read his or her Bible and pray?
This will help fill out the picture of what he or she means by
“spiritually alive.” To some, Bible study is important, but they
only do it once a month or a few times a year. This type of
question will give clarity to the depth of commitment your loved
one has.
You may also want to ask what she prays about. Is it merely
superficial and worldly in nature? Does she pray about looks and
money; not about holiness and eternity? It matters. “For as he
thinks in his heart, so is he” (Prov. 23:7).
This list can be added to, I am sure, but, these thoughts should
help you get going on some important matters to discuss and
consider. Feel free to send me more issues and ideas to add.
Finally, consider this: anyone looking for a spouse should be
prepared to spend time with his/her parents, siblings, and friends.
This will give insight into what kind of person he/she likes to be
around, what type of influences are there, and so on. It goes
without saying, a great deal of time needs to be spent with your
potential mate. Don't be in a rush to get married, no matter what.
Hastily entering into a life-long “contract” is not wise. Get to
know the other person well enough to find the faults, including the
major ones if you can. They need not stop a marriage from taking
place, but knowing what you will be dealing with will allow you to
go in with your eyes open.
*****
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All the best,
Steven